week three: on flexibility

I always end up writing these sometime past midnight… mini goal: write a reflection at a sane hour, at least once.

Research has been going slow but it’s still going, which is honestly better than I could have hoped for given the circumstances. A conversation with my research advisor towards the end of the week was really enlightening, and it was really helpful to hear a fresh perspective on what I’m working on from a trusted adult! I feel more confident that what I’m doing is meaningful and worthwhile, and that my progress is worth celebrating. I was also advised to reach out to my support network and talk through my research with others when it gets stifling, which I think will really ease the emotional workload.

I’m trying to be more flexible when it comes to the timeline. I knew from the get go that the initial timeline was overly idealistic, which is a problem I struggle with a lot as an excitable, ambitious person. However, something I want to get out of this project is improved planning skills and adaptability. I don’t want my initial vision to hold me back from changing gears when I realize it’s needed, and it ultimately wastes more time if I have to struggle with my pride every time I need to redirect and try again. This project in particular, which I didn’t have a ton of time to create the initial timeline for, will likely go through a number of revisions in terms of timeline and end product throughout the process. Whatever I don’t get done I can continue working on during the fall, so the name of the game is quality over quantity; I’d rather have half of what I planned to do done, presented with polish, than all of what I planned to do, but it all looks ugly. When people see my project, I want them to have a clear picture of what it’ll look like when it’s finished.

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So, goal for the week:

I’ll reassess my timeline, this time envisioning the lowest bar of success and going up from there. Recognizing that the research and writing will definitely take longer than a week per person, I’ll adjust the timeline so that I have enough time to focus on two people, and if I have extra time, I can continue onto the third and fourth person. I will continue on with the research and art with a sense of flexibility — regardless of what the end product looks like, as long as I give it my all, I’ll be proud of myself. That’s a promise I’m making now, and I intend to keep it.

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SM